-  148 Battery-68th Regiment / Royal Regiment of Artillery  - 

"FALL IN!" - Our First Parade

First “Square Bashing”

After the hair cut we had our first taste of Parade ground drill. We were marched up to the parade ground were we were taught how form three ranks: Open order marching , Halt, Left Turn, Right Turn, About Turn. What a shambles we were! Our heads were spinning. Some were turning left instead of turning right, some were setting off with their right foot instead of their left. “DON’T YOU KNOW YOUR RIGHT FROM YOUR LEFT.. YOU DOZY MEN! ”  This was our L/Bdr. At least he didn’t swear at us. We were marching in threes, and we were getting quite a way from the instructor when he suddenly yelled, “ABOUT TURN!”  Everyone 'About Turned' except the first three! They kept marching, and they said later they never heard the "About Turn” order...

The L/Bdr. went ballistic!  I digress for a moment.The Army had a way of sorting its men out. If someone did something wrong (not all the time but most of it) the whole Barrack room suffered. Because these three men had “not heard the order” we were all made to parade after 5:pm for an extra half hour drill. So what happened? The lads in the barrack room had words with the offenders.

I remember one lad who found it difficult coming to a halt.

We spent hours in the Barrack room trying to teach him.  When we were posted to Shoeburyness, this man came with us. He missed the passing out parade, he just couldn’t get the hang of this parade ground drill... and with a rifle,  no one dare stand near him! He usually clouted someone with it. He will remain nameless, but L/Bdr. Green (real name) recommended to Sgt. Cavell (real name) that this man would be better off being a Barrack room orderly for the day of the passing out parade, which  kept him out of the way. I suppose one has to feel for these guys, they were taken off the streets and put into uniform. They were from all walks of life; farmers, butchers, office workers, and factory workers like myself. All they really wanted to do was get their seven hundred and thirty days over with!  Yes, some had large calendars, and ticked every day off. These are not isolated cases either. I had one too for six weeks, but then threw it away.That six weeks seemed like ten.

Most of us were homesick, and I was missing my blue eyed Pam like crazy!

I’ve digressed quite a bit. After the Parade Ground fiasco, we were marched to the NAAFI (NAVY ARMY AIR FORCE INSTITUTION) We joined the queue, and it seemed we were always queuing! Now, how many times has this happened to ex-Sevicemen reading this? You get to the front of the queue, going through your mind what to eat for a snack... dying for a drink, when you suddenly hear the voice:

“RIGHT YOU LOT! ...GET YOURSELVES OUTSIDE! ”  We turn around and say,"But we haven’t had any!"….”DON’T ARGUE WITH ME!...OR I’LL HAVE YOU ON A FIZZER!”  (A charge) So you moved outside. Some of the lads had managed a drink, and some had just been served and were stuffing their mouths, and trying to drink at the same time. What a Life!

Then it was back on the parade ground until dinner time...